Children and Childishness
by Fallen Ark Angel
Summary: In which Mirajane and Laxus go from being mature to immature and vice versa. Then once more for good measure. And a bunch others because, why not? - One-shot.


Children and Childishness

"It," Mira moaned through chattering teeth, "is so cold."

Laxus sighed as he stood in their closet, pulling out some extra blankets. "I know, demon. I tried to fix the heater, but… Tomorrow I'll either get it working or call someone, huh?"

She only rubbed at her arms from over where she was, at the window, staring out at the still falling snow. "I hope this doesn't get too deep. Then I'll have a hard time getting down to the guild-"

Grunt. "Gets too deep, the guild is closed."

"Laxus, no."

"Mira, yes."

"Dragon."

"Demon."

Finally glancing over a him, she said, "Master."

"Don't call me that right now." He was moving to spread the blankets over to bed. "Just trying to get into my skivvies."

"Your whaties?"

"Don't play." He glanced her way too. "I know your game, woman."

"I'm too cold to take anything off. I need to put more on."

"No, you do not."

"Laxus."

"Come over here then," he suggested with a toothy grin. "I'll warm you up."

"Mmmm," Mira hummed, turning to look out the window once more. "Or I could just turn into a bear."

"C-Come again?"

"You know, so then I'd be all warm and fuzzy and we could snuggle."

"No thanks." Laxus needed no time to contemplate that. At all. "Just want my demon."

"You sure?"

"Very."

"You don't think that I'll maul you, do you?"

He could hear the teasing in her tone, but ignored it. "No, but I'm not big on having freaking bears in my bed, so-"

"Just demons?"

"And dragons." Heading over to her then instead, Laxus just came to lay a hand on her shoulder before saying, "Come on. It's late. Let's go to bed."

"I just like watching the snow."

"I know." He leaned down to nuzzle his face against the top of her head. "But you worked all day. Come lay down with me."

"'kay," she conceded, turning slowly to face him. "But you know what else we need."

"Hmmm?"

"On the bed."

"Oh." Laxus grinned then again, if only slightly. "Yeah, I know."

So, as she moved to go get in bed, Laxus only headed over to the closet, to pull out his big fluffy coat, and toss it over the blankets already there. It was, after all, Mira's favorite thing to snuggle up to.

Other than him.

Or at least he deluded himself as much.

Heh.

When he joined her, Laxus tried to wrap his arms around her, but Mira only gave him her back. Which was fine. It was just as cuddly.

"Mmmm." He kissed the back of her neck, having push her hair out of the way to do so. "You comfy?"

"Mmmhmm."

"Good." Some snuggling. 'cause he was in a good mood. "Me too."

"No, you're not."

"Am too." That time, her neck got a nuzzle. "Demon. I really wanna just go to sleep now. Don't you?"

"I'm kinda not tired."

"You were yawning the entire time you were closing up tonight," he pointed out. "And did you eat today?"

"I was working."

"Oh, demon."

"No, Lax, just-"

"I'll be right back." He slipped back out of the bed, moving swiftly across the cold hardwood floor. "Don't move."

"Dragon, I'm not hungry."

That just got a grunt and, well, there was no arguing with the man. Mirajane just hunkered down in the blankets and coat, awaiting his return.

Which took too long it seemed, as by the time he did make it back to her, she was snoozing without him. And after all that work he put into her sandwiches.

Err, well, half a sandwich. The other two and a half were for him, but whatever. She could have some more if she wanted.

"Demon." He climbed right back into bed, quick to toss some covers over himself. She was asleep; he didn't have to pretend to be invincible. It was truly cold and he was fine with that being known. "Wake up. Dragon got you something to eat. You hungry? Huh?"

"Nnnrrgg," she groaned, rubbing her head into the pillow. "I'm sleeping, Lax."

"Yeah, well, now you're eating. Look, I made us sandwiches."

"Us?"

"Us."

"Mmmm." Slowly, she moved to sit up some. "Maybe I can eat half of one."

"Maybe," he agreed, holding the plate out to her. "Oh, and important question."

She had moved to lift up half of one of the sandwiches, but stilled at that. "Oh?"

Nodding, the slayer said, "It's just that I, you know, have been thinking."

"Did it hurt?"

"Mirajane."

"Go on," she giggled. "What have you been thinking about, Mr. Dragon?"

"Well, Mrs. Dragon," he began slowly, knowing that the moniker pleased her. "Quite frankly, this is something that we've discussed before and, on your part, had less than a satisfactory response."

"Not getting where the question part comes in, but- Mmmm, dragon." She paused as, after trying to talk with her mouth full, found how much she enjoyed the taste of the sandwich. Grinning up at him, she said, "This is really good."

"No."

"Yes."

"You're just hungry."

She shook her head. "Really good."

"Hungry." Then he frowned. "And I was kind of in the middle of something, you know."

"Oh."Another chomp. Mouth full of sandwhich-y goodness, Mira got out, "Continue."

"It's just that… I don't know, Mira. You were so into it, you know. Were always talking about it and-'

"Sorry, Lax, but what is the it that you're talking about?" She'd finished her half and was reaching for another. She about dropped it as his next words came out.

"Oh, sorry." Laxus glanced at her. "Having a baby."

"W-What? Laxus-"

"I know, I know," he sighed, looking off once more. "I was kinda an ass the last time we discussed it, but-"

"And the time before that and the one before that and ooh, could you imagine, the one before-"

"Alright, alright, I get it. I'm a jerk about things that I don't wanna do. Sheesh." He rolled his shoulders before saying, "That's why I wanted to ask you if… If you still were thinking about-"

"Yes." She did put the other end of the sandwich back on the plate then, sitting up even more to stare over at him. "Of course."

"Then… Well, shit, Mira, I don't-"

"Why did this suddenly come to you?"

"It didn't. I told you I was thinkin', didn't I?" Giving her a half snarl, he said, "I'm a complex man, demon. Sometimes it takes a bit for things to make sense to me."

"That makes you sound more like a simple man, but-"

"Mirajane-"

"Are you serious, Lax?" She was staring at him with those big blues and, hell, how could he ever joke about something so important to her? She should know him better than that. "About this? I mean, all the other times we've talked about it, you've been-"

"We already went over that."

Although it did merit repeating as, truth be told, he had more than once flipped out on her suggesting such a thing. Which she had. Many times over the years. When they were dating, he used to just phase her out, as he was able to convince himself that the likelihood of him ever even wanting to marry her was out of the question, but with time's progression sprung up quite the resentment in the slayer over the subject.

He just wasn't...father material. At all. He drank a lot and didn't really like the sound of whining. And crying, hell, he couldn't take that. Or dirty diapers (dragon senses and all). Not to mention those late night feedings. Laxus was _not_ the type to miss out on his eight hours. A half rested Laxus was a nightmare Laxus.

Mirajane, however, had always wanted kids and, the more and more marriage seemed to gain traction in their relationship, the more and more she brought it up. Because if he wasn't ever going to want any, then they shouldn't be together. That's flat out what she told him. A lot. And it pissed him off so much.

He wasn't the kind of guy that liked sausage. He preferred bacon. But Mirajane liked sausage. So you know what he did? Huh? Sucked it the hell up. Why couldn't she do that for him then? Huh? And just not have kids? Who wanted them anyways? All they did was poop and piss and cry and...and…

Ugh.

So he came to blows with her on that subject until, finally, he agreed to yes, one day, they could approach the subject like the adults they were supposed to be (sometimes he still felt twelve) and come to a consensus. But three years into their marriage that day had yet to come and, really, Mira had her fill of children mostly from babysitting all of their friends kids. Especially her sister's son.

Win-win.

But…

Sigh.

"Yeah, dragon," Mira was saying then. "I know. But-"

"I just was… I don't know." He set the plate in his lap before crossing his arms, as if defensive. "Recently I just feel...funny."

"Funny?"

He gave her a curt nod. "I didn't even get it, really, at first. When I'd see the Salamander with his...kid..."

"Your nephew." Mirajane drove that home to him a lot. The thought of him being related to Natsu disgusted and disturbed Laxus, enough so that he thought numerous times about ruining Lisanna's marriage, but he just knew that'd backfire and the demon would find out and, well, he kinda liked living. Which is what he figured she'd ban him from if that happened. And he liked Lisanna's happiness.

Sort of.

"Yeah." Laxus' tongue was as heavy as his tone. "My nephew."

"You were jealous," Mirajane continued. "Right?"

"Not really. I mean, I'm the Master and infinitely better than the Salamander in every way, so-"

"Laxus, be serious."

Letting out a slight breath, he whispered, "It just seems like it'd feel...nice. Good. Great even. More complete."

Mirajane let that sit for a moment before saying, "How long have you been thinking about this, Laxus?"

"I don't know." He shrugged. "A few weeks."

"And you haven't mentioned it because-"

"I've been contemplating, okay?" And, more importantly, he knew that if he came to Mirajane right off the bat with these thoughts, then she'd jump the gun and assume that he definitely was ready for a child and force him into agreeing. He had to come to his own terms with just what he was feeling. "And I think… I mean, we're, like, the greatest people in Fiore."

"Earth Land."

"Right. Earth Land," he agreed. "And we're the best mages."

"To ever live."

"Yeah. To ever live. And that should...carry on. Our genes. Mixed up together. Through sex."

She blinked. Then she leaned closer and sniffed. Softly, she asked, "Are you drunk?"

"What? No. Mirajane-"

"Dragon-"

"I'm not."

"Well-"

"I wanna...have...a baby with you." It felt like a huge relief to say for some reason and only made him frowned. Staring down into her eyes once more, he said, "Or at least stop trying not to have one."

"What?"

"I mean, I don't want want to go in this, like, _trying_ trying, but just like, I dunno, not _not_ trying."

Her eyes turned accusatory then, as if tricked. "You are drunk."

"Damn it, demon, you're the one that serves me up at the bar."

Huh. She let out a breath before saying, "I just don't want you to go back on this and-"

"I wanna have little, tiny, cute, and smelly, but adorable baby dragons and demons." He bit his tongue. "Err, one. One or the other. I really haven't given much thought which would be better and since, like, I don't get a choice, I think it's best if I don't start hoping either way-"

"Laxus. Enough."

And then, in the darkness of their bedroom, with the sound of the wind whipping the frozen world outside all they could hear, Mirajane and Laxus looked at one another honestly and heavily, if only for a moment.

"Do you really want to try and have a baby?"

Did he?

Laxus swallowed, heavily, before nodding slightly. "Yeah, Mira. I do. I wanna...feel it. You know? Like when the Salamander's-" He stopped at the sight of her heavy gaze before correcting himself. "When my little nephew learned how to talk and you guys were all happy and he would grin and Natsu and Lisanna were both...proud and… I don't know, Mira. I just don't think that that little lame brain is good enough to be the only baby around with Strauss blood running through him. And mixed up with the Salamander's-"

"Okay, well, for starters, Niran is only a three and not here to defend himself and, honestly, if you call him lame again, I'll hold a pillow over your face."

Maybe they weren't mature enough for baby talk…

He only huffed. "My point is, Mirajane, that I… I wanna have that too. I already got the guild and I have you and… It would be a big step, I know, and is, like, one of the biggest things that keeps bothering me. Because a baby would change, like, everything. _Everything_. Even our feelings towards one another. Which, as it stands, I rather like the way we are with one another now. I mean, before I insulted Niran-"

"Laxus-"

"But the point is, Mira-"

"I'm sure we'll get around to it eventually."

"-that I love you. And...nothing could change that. Especially not a...super cool little...baby dragon that did everything with me and we would spend every day together and he'd look up to me and I'd be his hero and he'd kick his cousin's stupid ass all the time even though he was younger and I'd show hi things, like how great I am and how to use magic and, I mean, I won't shove a lacrima down his throat or nothin', but it won't matter, because I bet he'll have an innate magic that just blows everyone else's out of the water and oh my gosh."

"You're drunk?"

He shook his head. "I want a boy."

"Oh, Laxus-"

Turning to glance at her, he asked, "Mirajane, do you want to have a little boy with me?"

"Well, I thought we already went over the fact that it would kinda be the luck of the draw and also sorta, you know, dependent on...you in some ways, but mostly just random and we'd be happy either way and, mostly, that we were just trying, but not _trying_ trying, so-"

"Although." And she'd lost Laxus for the night as he began that profound rumination that he reserved for the biggest questions in life. Such as what the meaning of it all was and why they were put there and, most importantly, why did a beaver and duck have sex in the first place? Or was a platypus not the product of such a thing? "A little girl could be fun. She'd wear dresses and ask me to buy her things and, fine, she could learn a silly little magic, but she'd mostly just sit around and tell me how awesome I am and annoy me, probably, because she'd be afraid of bugs and I'd have to kill them for her, but it'd be okay because-"

"Laxus."

"What? You're afraid of damn cockroaches. Why can't she be?"

"No. I meant-"

"I mean, are those sorts of things passed down through genes or-"

"Laxus, shut up for a minute. Just take a breath."

So he did. But his head was still reeling. He knew a bit about genetics (the basics, anyhow), but were fears and phobias learned or innate? Did it matter? No. But would his curiosity stay peaked for the rest of eternity (or at least his memory of wishing to learn such a thing)? Yes. Possibly. Who knew? Not him. All he knew is that he definitely wanted a daughter...or did he?

"Girls go through that really awkward...period phase that lasts the rest of their life until, like, I'm probably dead anyways," he pointed out to his clearly unimpressed wife then. "And I'm not good, you know, even thinking about you… It makes me gag, honestly, and just… Let's have a boy...who would go through something different and I'd have to explain life and women and...that to him...and… Bleh. Never mind. Baby shop is closed."

Mira had been sitting there, completely annoyed and hardly listening, but did catch that last part, which made her frown.

"Wait, what? Laxus-"

"Here you go, demon." He handed over the plate then. "The thought of...you know...periods and stuff kinda ruined my appetite. I'mma just hit the sack, huh? You get too cold, wake me up. And then I'll warm you up."

"Laxus Dreyar, you stupid-"

"Damn it, Mira," he complained as he only rolled onto his side, facing away from her. With a roll of his eyes (only because he knew she couldn't see and yell about his disrespect), he said, "Of course I'm joking. We're gonna start trying to have a baby. Soon. I mean, yeah, it's scary and that stuff will be tough, but that other stuff I mentioned? That'll be great. I know it will. Because I've seen what it's done to everyone else and it makes me what to have it too. To love something that much. And share it with you. It'll only make our relationship stronger. There's no other way about it. I love you and I always will. Crying, poopy baby or not."

They were heavy too, his words, as they fell between the two of them, Mirajane still sitting up and him on his side, staring over at the clock, watching the seconds tick away into minutes. Mirajane didn't know what to say, which was a hard thing for him to accomplish, and they were silent for a bit, both thinging on the future and if they were really ready for it.

Then Laxus spoke again.

"But, just to be clear, I wasn't joking about that...feminine stuff making me...vomit. So when that comes up-"

"Yeah, Laxus, like I really wanted you of all people to explain anything even remotely relating to the human body to our children. Boy or girl."

He beamed. "You really get me, demon. You're the one."

And, as unfortunate as it was at times, he was definitely the one for her too.

"Just promise me that you're not just high on life or jealous of Natsu and Lisanna or something silly like that," she said then. "That you've really thought about this and you really are ready to do this. To...be the Daddy Dragon."

Laxus snorted. "Ready? I'm more than ready. I'll have you know, the other day, Levy stopped by looking for you and had her disgusting brat with her and I watched him for a whole three minutes as she went to the bathroom."

"And he didn't...die?"

"Nope. Almost swallowed a button, but with my superb instincts I was able to pry it from his disgusting, and oddly sticky hand, though I think that was from his spit, and save the day."

For some reason, that didn't quell the rising rumbling in Mirajane's stomach. She didn't think it was hunger nor was it nerves. Just...maybe some sort of happiness mixed with anticipation and fear and worry and concern and….

Was that what parents felt? Because maybe Laxus had it right for the past few years. If she was going to have to deal with that for the rest of forever-

"We'll be great parents, demon." Laxus let out a slow breath then and she knew he was finally drifting off. "I mean, you raised your siblings and I practically raised myself. Shining resumes, I figure."

Mirajane only snuggled down into the bed, plate of sandwiches still in hand, before glancing over at the window where the snow was still trying hard to blanket (and possibly suffocate) all of Magnolia.

"I love you, dragon."

"Mmmm," he yawned before mumbling, "Love you too. Demon."

* * *

 **Eek. I was trying to knock out some of the plots for Miraxus week early so I could have them ready to post when it came around, but… Then this happened. Just more weird Laxus and Mirajane stuff. And for some reason, the thought of Natsu becoming related to Laxus is _really_ growing on me. **


End file.
